Don't Insult the Art of Bubblegum
by Constalina
Summary: Marui shows Kirihara the art of bubblegum. Totally random.


Author's note: I never seem to finish the fanfics I start… Who cares

**Author's note:** Random, so very random. This had no particular plot. Just something I thought about.

"Marui-sempai?" asked Kirihara. Niou, Marui, and Kirihara 'accidentally' ripped apart Yanagi's data book, earning themselves 100 laps, and an extra 5 for Niou for pulling down Kirihara's pants in therapy classes.

"What?"

"Why do you eat bubblegum all the time?" Niou slowed down to talk to them.

"Because he's a ball of fat. Isn't that obvious?" Marui smacked Niou behind his head. "Ouch!"

"Shut up and stay out of our conversation."

"Well sorry, your royal roundness." Marui smacked Niou again. Niou sped up, grumbling. Marui turned back to Kirihara.

"Stamina."

"What?"

"Stamina. I eat bubblegum because it increases my stamina."

"But there are other things that can increase stamina. Why didn't you pick something, I dunno, that gives you skills." Marui glared at him.

"Skills? Bubblegum blowing _is_ a skill! Bubblegum blowing is an art!" The offended wannabe tensai sped up, leaving the confused Kirihara behind.

_Later…_

"Kirihara, do you know what's wrong with Marui?" asked Yukimura, "He's been sulking, and won't tell anyone what's wrong. No one else knows either." Yanagi popped out of nowhere.

"There's a 100 percent chance that Kirihara said something about Marui's bubblegum," he said.

"Yanagi, I thought you didn't know anything about the situation."

"It took me a while to rewrite my data." Yanagi 'glared' at Kirihara.

"It wasn't my idea! It was Niou-sempai's!" said Kirihara. Yanagi disappeared without another word.

"What did you say about Marui's bubblegum?"

"Nothing! I just asked why he ate bubblegum. Then I asked why he doesn't learn a worthwhile skill. Then he ran off, all offended and stuff!" Jackal, Marui, Niou, and Yagyuu were having a practice match in a nearby court, and heard their conversation, making Marui furious. He hit the ball with so much force that it slammed into Yagyuu's face, who toppled into a cart containing tennis balls. The balls flew in all directions. E.g. other carts, other members of the Rikkai tennis team, etc. Some of the balls from the other carts flew towards Yukimura and Kirihara. Using their awesome tennis skills, they returned all the balls, and they all landed in the baskets. The other Rikkai regulars did the same.

"BUBBLEGUM BLOWING IS A WORTHWHILE SKILL!" roared Marui. He stomped off into the change rooms.

"Yeah! For a ball of fat!" yelled Niou. Marui slammed the door. Yukimura smilied unusually sweetly.

"10 laps, Niou." Niou ran, smirking. Kirihara pulled his hair in distress.

"What am I saying that's wrong?!" Yukimura sighed.

"I'll sort things out with Marui." Kirihara hugged Yukimura.

"Thank you, Mura-buchou!"

_Next day…_

"Sorry, Kirihara, I couldn't calm Marui down," said Yukimura.

"Damn him," moaned Kirihara.

"Does anyone have any ideas on how to calm down Marui?" asked Sanada.

"Stop insulting him," said Yanagi bluntly. He was still sulking about his notebook.

"Give him sweets?" suggested Jackal.

"Annoy the shit of Sanada or Kirihara?" said Niou. Everyone glared at him. "What? That cheers me up!" Kirihara looked at Yagyuu, who appeared to be deep in thought.

"Do you have any ideas, Yagyuu-sempai?" he asked as sweetly as possible. Great lot of effort from the demon of Rikkai.

"Yes," he said in a quiet voice. Then he raised his voice, "Bubblegum blowing is a great skill." Kirihara was oblivious to why he was doing this. Then Yanagi whispered,

"Marui's at the window. Don't look at him. Go with Yagyuu's plan." Kirihara couldn't help but let his eyes wander to the window. Sure enough, a pinkish red mop of hair was at the window. Kirihara scoffed inwardly at his sempai's inability to conceal himself.

"What's the plan?" asked Kirihara.

"Flatter him," whispered Jackal.

"I wonder how that ball of fat," began Niou. Everyone pinched him. "Ou… I mean, I wonder how _Marui _manages to blow such _big_ bubbles." Everyone noted Niou's sarcasm.

"Great going, trickster," mumbled Kirihara.

"Shut up, brat," snapped Niou. They went on kiss-assing Marui for a while. Marui walked away, bouncing. The only thing that would make him happier would be to meet up with Fuji Syuusuke.

"Marui-sempai!" Kirihara ran up to Marui sempai.

"What?"

"Could you show me why bubblegum blowing is good?" Marui smirked.

"Translation: 'Could you please show me your awesome tricks?' Right?" Kirihara shrugged.

"Guess so."

"Okay!"

_Later…_

"No. Fucking. Way." Kirihara stared at the floating bubblegums, each moulded into different shapes. Kirihara stared at the proud Marui.

"This is why I am a tensai," he said. It was like watching a clown shape balloons for the first time, or watching a glass blower, except this was Marui Bunta with bubblegum.

"Sempai! This is beyond logic. It's witchcraft! It's wizardry! It's Harry Potter!" Marui twitched.

"Harry Potter isn't something you can do." Kirihara pulled his hair.

"This is impossible! No one can do this!" Marui laughed.

"That's why it's an art! It's one of the hardest things in the world! It's a difficult skill! It takes years to master." Marui stood up to leave.

"Wait, Marui-sempai!"

"Yeah?" Kirihara mumbled something. "What's that?"

"Could I have some bubblegum?" Marui threw a bubblegum pack to Kirihara.

"Good luck kid." Marui left the clearing, leaving Kirihara to figure out how to open the packet.

_Next day…_

"What are you doing Kirihara?" asked Yukimura.

"Damn it!"

"What's wrong?"

"I can't open this goddamned bubblegum packet!" Marui heard Yukimura fall, anime style.

**Author's note: **It's official. I'm insane.


End file.
